Sex robots. We've been told they were coming (pun intended) for the last 20 years. So where are they? We've had robots that can build cars since the 1980s. Honda's ASIMO has been able to navigate stairs for nearly a decade. So ... we're expected to believe that robots who can trot upstairs holding a wine glass won't be able to give us an orgasm once they get up there?
Well, there's recently been a new development in the field. Have you ever heard of Oculus Rift and its amazing virtual reality gaming helmet? The company is a world leader in virtual reality tech and recently funded its latest prototype with a $2 million Kickstarter campaign. This new VR prototype has noise-canceling, immersive headphones and a 7-inch view screen that is said to eliminate motion blur completely. If you've ever worn VR headgear, you already know that this is a very big deal. Motion blur is the aspect of virtual reality gear that can cause headaches and nausea during use. And that isn't really conducive to game play ... or sex play. The VR viewer and headset will be used to experience a huge selection of upcoming games for PC, Mac, and Linux computers. But that's not the sexy part …
This winter, sex toy innovators Tenga let a few gamers test an attachment to the Oculus Rift setup that uh … what's a delicate way to say this? Well, the attachment fits over a penis and gives it a computerized hand job. Yes! In addition to VR goggles and headphones, one more part of the male anatomy can be ensconced in robot parts and stimulated for game play. The games for this are anime style, and feature scantily clad cartoon girls that look far too young to be giving handies to strangers in video games. But I digress. Check out how it works in the video below. (Testers remain fully clothed in the demonstration videos. No need to get the vapors.)
Tenga sex toys seems like the perfect company to develop a fuckable appliance. Its existing line of sex toys caters to males who are serious about solo play. The company's masturbation aid cups are available in reusable and disposable versions and consist of either a heavy sleeve or a sleeve that can be flipped into a case. Let's hope it also has an option for some stick-on bling. The cups have adjustable pressurized valves and seem quite elegant for something designed to be ejaculated into regularly. Cup accessories include various lubricants, and warmers that work on the same principle as those hand-warmer bags I used to take camping as a kid. Innovative, right?
Throw in a virtual reality setup and users can watch the anime girls doing their thing, hear their uncomfortably youthful giggling as they do it, and experience a joyous happy ending from the comfort of their very own homes. I'm not exactly sure how to level up in this game, but I imagine we'll find out on YouTube soon enough. No, this isn't a full-sized sex robot that doubles as a maid. Those are probably going to be a while. For now, though, I think this is a big leap forward in virtual sex. (Learn about other high-tech developments in Sex Robots: High-Tech Sex Toy or Something More?)
Honda's ASIMO has been able to navigate stairs for nearly a decade, and yet we're expected to believe that robots who can trot upstairs holding a wine glass won't be able to give us an orgasm once they get up there.
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