Do you know what's not required to have a great time? An erection. While erections can certainly change the sensations you're experiencing, touch can still feel pleasurable even without getting hard. Plus, an erection isn't even a required precursor to orgasm. Most people can still orgasm while soft!
Do you know what's not required to have a great time? An erection. These sex toys can make flaccid penis play just as fun as anything you'd be able to do with a hard on.
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While a firmer shaft is required to slide into a tight orifice (though penis extenders can help make that possible even when you're soft), it isn't required to enjoy yourself. Understanding this can take a lot of pressure off of your partnered and solo adventures and open up a whole new way of looking at sex.
Today, let's dig into why you might play with a soft penis and some of the ways that sex toys can help make that pleasure as amazing as possible.
Editor's Note: While gender is often used within this article, it's only to ensure the people who want this information can find it. These sex toys can work for anyone with a penis, and at Kinkly, we know not just men have penises. If you have a penis or enjoy masturbating or having sex in ways that penis-owners do, this article is for you!
Why use sex toys with a flaccid penis?
There are a lot of reasons why your body may not have an erection today. Blood flood, stress, age, a busy schedule, and your last orgasm was all impact if your body will get an erection. It might even just be too cold! Some days, your body just doesn't feel like getting hard. The list is long enough that we'd be here all day if I listed them all out!
And when you just can't get hard, sex toys can help you find sexual pleasure. That right there is the biggest reason to experiment with toys!
Some more common reasons you'd want to use a sex toy with a flaccid penis include:
- You're still in your refraction period. You've had an orgasm recently, but you still feel like having more sensation. Your penis may not get hard, but you still want to play.
- You're transitioning or transgender. Your gender affirming care may mean that erections are infrequent or impossible. But this doesn't need to prevent you from experiencing sexual pleasure.
- You simply don't get erections anymore. Due to a medical condition or other factors, your body may simply not get erections anymore. You certainly don't need an erection to enjoy yourself, so why not find sex toys that work with your body as it is today?
Regardless of the reason, sex toys allow you to enjoy yourself in any and all states that your body is in. If you feel like pleasure, you can have it, and it won't be tied to a biological process over which you have limited control.
Top Sex Toys for a Soft Penis
Though many sex toys may become difficult to use without an erection and the sex toy industry is still catching up to how much fun flaccid penis play can be, there are some options out there that will probably work for you!
Hot Octopuss Pulse Solo Essential
Oscillations + an open design = an orgasmically great time. Marketed as one of the first "guybrators", the Hot Octopuss Pulse Solo Essential uses an open-face design that was actually crafted for flaccid penises.
You simply tuck your flaccid shaft into the cylindrical chamber, pressing the frenulum up against the crowned logo inside. This crowned circle marks the center point of the PulsePlate which powers piston-like oscillations at your most sensitive spot. It feels like a really deep, really rumbly, very powerful vibrator!
For flaccid use, you'll probably find that you want to use your fingers to keep your penis tucked exactly where it feels best against the Pulse's vibrating surface, but some people swear by using a hair tie around the entire toy to help "fasten" it to the shaft.
If you're into the idea of couple's play, this exact same design - with two remote controls and added power - is available in the Hot Octopuss Pulse Duo Lux. It's crafted for partnered play.
Lovense Gush
Another open-ended penis vibrator, the Gush allows you to tuck your soft penis into its chamber to add deliciously powerful vibrations. Compared to the Pulse Solo Essential, the Gush's wings and internal chamber are harder to tuck a flaccid penis into, but some people enjoy the Gush because it feels like a much snugger "fit" once they've squished their length into its textured surface.
The Gush also offers app connectivity! You can connect the Gush to the free Lovense app to unlock the magic of online play. From anywhere in the world, your play partner can control your vibrator. You can even use the app to take part in Lovense's annual virtual orgy or synchronize your Gush to some of your favorite adult games, music, or audio porn.
Sir Richards Vibrating Edging Trainer
The Vibrating Edging Trainer follows the same premise of the first two toys – an open-ended penis vibrating. But the Edging Trainer has a softer motor and less features. Just tuck your flaccid penis in-between the two open wings, and enjoy as the center seam's vibrator pleasures your shaft.
With the Vibrating Edging Trainer's much softer, open wings, you may need to squeeze this sex toy a little more firmly than you would the Gush or the Pulse Solo Essential – but it always depends on what sensations you want to feel!
Satisfyer Men Wand
If you're someone who likes the masturbate while laying down on your back, the Men Wand can work with a flaccid penis. Simply lay down, get comfortable, position your soft penis against your tummy, and lay the Men Wand on top, enjoying its full-shaft vibrations with the wrap-around wing tips.
However, be aware: the Men Wand can get a little unwieldy if you try to use it while standing or sitting; the flaccid penis may slide right out of the Men Wand's smaller "wings".
Screaming O Jackits Stroker Pad
While sliding a flaccid penis into most penis strokers will be an exercise in frustration, using something like the Jackits Stroker Pad might work better. This flexible, flat, textured oval can simply be wrapped around any shape or size.
If the idea of stroking with a sex toy sounds fantastic to you, the Stroker Pad might be one way to make it happen. You won't get the same long movements you can get with an erection, but it can offer a way to make stroking happen, especially if you're open to two handed play. Just nestle that shaft inside the Stroker Pad like a sexy burrito!
Oxballs Sackjack
This one may not work for everyone, but it's worth mentioning in case it's of interest to you. The Sackjack is a stroker, but it also encapsulates the balls. Sliding the balls into the Sackjack can help anchor the sleeve, making it possible to stroke the Sackjack in small micro thrusts without your flaccid shaft "falling out" of the masturbation sleeve.
That being said, it can take a bit of lube and a lot of patience to slide a soft penis into the Sackjack. The Sackjack's super stretchy material helps make this a bit easier, but it's still an exercise in perseverance.
For a change of pace, some people enjoy wearing the Sackjack around the house! With a bit of lube, the internal ribbing can offer pleasure and weight that can feel great as constant, low-level stimulation.
Viballdo
Why not move away from the penis entirely? If you want to take the shaft out of the equation, consider the Viballdo. This innovative toy slips around the testicles and essentially turns your balls into a dildo that can slide into a partner or stroker.
The Viballdo makes this possible with its unique design. You insert your balls into an open-sided "cage," allowing the skin of your scrotum to receive all the vibrations and sensations. Adding the Viballdo "spacers" allow you to push your testicles really snugly into the Viballdo, getting the skin taut and primed for pleasure.
Some men report having orgasms from just ball stimulation, known as "ballgasms." It makes sense if you think about it. The scrotum has a ton of nerve ending that often go entirely ignored.
If vibrations aren't your thing, the Viballdo is also available as the Balldo – a non-vibrating version of the same toy.
Evolved Undercarriage
If sliding your balls into an orifice isn't for you, consider vibrating them instead. The Evolved Undercarriage rests atop your scrotum as if it's a little pedestal. The wrap-around material and texturing then pleasures the base of the shaft and the balls.
With a flaccid penis, you'll find the Undercarriage works best if you're seated on a surface or your balls are otherwise supported in underwear. It feels best when the balls are pulled up towards the body, allowing them to nestle into the molded cups to enjoy the vibrations. Resting your balls on your thighs or using underwear can work really well!
Wand Massagers
While most people talk about wand massagers in relation to clitoral play, they're actually just as useful for penis pleasure with no erection is required!
In fact, a lot of men swear by a powerful wand massager, not just ones designed specifically for a penis like the Satisfyer Men Wand. Just as these powerhouses can coax an orgasm out of a stubborn clitoris, they can do the same thing with a flaccid penis. Turns out, adding tons of stimulation to the body can work magic regardless of what "parts" you have.
To get the most bang for your buck here (literally), I'd recommend picking from some of the most powerful wand massagers out there. This isn't a time that I'd recommend going for a budget option. After all, we want your wand experience to get you the orgasm you want. For that, I'd recommend the corded Magic Wand if you can tolerate cords or the Fun Factory VIM if you want something cordless with a less... clinical aesthetic. The Domi 2 is also a great option, but its smaller head size may make it harder to aim.
Once you have that wand, position your flaccid shaft where you'd like it and press the head of the wand massager up against the shaft. Most people will find it feels best around the frenulum. When you've hit that perfect spot, consider making small rocking motions with the wand. These "mini strokes" might feel great, but they might not be your thing.
Just keep an eye on the clock. Just like for clit owners, powerful wand massagers can actually cause loss of sensation after a little bit. This is temporary, but it can be a frustrating and disappointing occurrence when you drew out your edging session a little too long, and now you're too overstimulated to cum.
If marathon sessions are your jam, consider alternating between the wand massager and other sources of stimulation to prevent overstimulation.
Electrostimulation with the Rodeo Robin
TENS Units and electrostimulation have been used to stimulate muscles and cause muscle contractions in the medical field for awhile now. And since orgasms are just powerful muscle contractions, electrostim can be a... stimulating way to play with your flaccid penis.
Some people find that they can use the power of electrosex for hands-free orgasms. With the right pulse and frequency for your body, estimulation can be used to orgasm without ever lifting a finger. It's honestly pretty magical!
This isn't a cheap endeavor, though. While the relatively inexpensive Rodeo Robin straps are adjustable and can be used on a flaccid shaft, they require a Powerbox to add the electrosex capabilities. Once you have that Powerbox, though, you can use it with any other compatible electrosex toys you have in mind, opening up the entire world of estimulation for your enjoyment.
To get started with estim, Sunny Megatron has some information here. You'll have to modify her suggestions for penis pleasure, but it's a great place to start.
If you're open to adding even more electrosex points to achieve your results, Mystim sells the Big Bend-It for anal pleasure too.
Anything Anal!
While anal play isn't for everyone, if you're open to it, adding anal play can reveal a whole new erogenous zone to explore. Not only can anal play lead to hands-free anal orgasms, but it also adds pleasure to the masturbation you've already been enjoying. A stroking session can feel much more explosive with an anal toy pleasuring you at the same time!
Since anal play circumvents the penis entirely, flaccid or erect doesn't matter. In fact, some people find that anal play may temporarily cause them to lose their erection as they're focused so heavily on the intense sensations of the bum. So that's pretty fun too!
If you're looking for a beginner-friendly introduction to anal, some of these might be up your alley:
So, the next time your penis just won't cooperate, remember that an erection is not a prerequisite for sexual pleasure. Just grab a toy, and get the sensations flowing.
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